I was married at the end of June and the small-talk question has been, “How’s married life?” Because my husband and I lived together for two years, friends typically pause a beat and say, “I bet nothing’s changed.”
Actually, something has changed and it is in the words husband and wife. Now that we have names to call each other, besides “girlfriend” or “fiancé,” it is simpler to discuss each other at work.
I realized this a few weeks ago when I called my husband to ask about dinner plans. Before we were married, we would speak in hushed tones, and the conversation would typically be very quick. This time we didn’t whisper and chatted longer. The difference, my husband suggested, had to do with the fact that now he was speaking to his “wife.”
Having the titles, husband and wife, seems to legitimize the intrusion of one’s personal life in the workplace. Readers, do you find that the terms “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” have a less legitimate ring?
–Wall Street Journal editor Emily Friedlander in the August 21,2007, Wall Street Journal, page D5
… and statistically … they have a markedly lower chance of staying married than those who did not first live together… So the culture simply highlights that most normal couples live together before marrying. Gack.
Md Brian
“Readers, do you find that the terms “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” have a less legitimate ring?”
Yep. And that is because those terms are in fact less legitimate.
Can we expect more of these true confessions from Murdoch’s WSJ? It felt illegitimate before you were married, but now you’re using it to sell newspapers?
[Just so you are aware] John B. Chilton, it is NOT Murdoch’s WSJ yet. I’m afraid your comment does pertain to the Dow Jones company though.
Slightly edited. The writer is correct; the companies involved in the takeover said they expect the deal to close some time in the fourth quarter–KSH.
[i]the terms “boyfriend†or “girlfriend†have a less legitimate ring?[/i]
Boyfriend or girlfriend are perfectly legitimate terms if that is all your relationship is. When I took my vows of Holy Matrimony before God and my church the relationship changed at that moment. I swore that I would “love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?” Ours is a sacramental marriage and we prepared for that with counseling and talks with our families. I knew at a young age that I would rather be alone than be married to someone who didn’t take his vows seriously. I’m also grateful to our parents and grandparents for giving us great examples with marriages that lasted 50-60+ years…until death did they part.
Deep blessings to all here who believe in the sacramentality of their marriage! You are icons of love.